In a Funk

Have been in a horrid funk all day. I guess outwardly everything seems fine. Went with Mark to Best Buy to help him buy himself a tiny computer (he got a cute one -- only kept from realizing its full cuteness potential by not being pink). Went and got a mani. Set up Mark's computer. Generally messed around (laundry is in the dryer now -- at least got that done plus my work as a Journal Editor -- which pays for my manis so I kinda have to do it).

Glad to see Sydney -- but the post vacation blues are hitting hard. Just wish I could check out for a month or a year. I don't belong in cold, in the U.S.A. I belong in a tropical beach -- my rightful place in the Universe the casualty of "history". Dreading teaching ESL tomorrow. Dreading work on Monday. Dreading going to Florida with the gang from work next week. Dreading leaving Sydney. Dreading being away from Mark. Dreading all the work that needs to be done.

I think the sadness came in from watching the Africa DVD that Akos and Jessica sent. They did a great job of blending music and pictures and videos. Somehow though watching the images and listening to the words has plunged me into questioning whether I really have done anything useful with my life. Have I learned anything? Why didn't I teach -- which is so much more rewarding? Was having "security" and making more money worth it? What is security? Would anything ever make me feel as good as being Anthony's Mom? Should I find a work/travel program in the developing world and try to talk Mark into doing good deeds?

And of course the question that has been nagging me since High School. Was Mr. B -- the literature teacher seemingly engaged in inappropriate relationships with my more developed high school classmates right? Was my "future" in literature? I think I must just be having a Kafka moment or something -- brought on by too much thinking -- a dangerous thing to do (Beauty and the Beast -- one of my fave phrases). I wish I could just turn off my mind sometimes ...........

The Return Home

Set the alarm for 7 AM – but woke up naturally after 8 hours sleep. Our flight was not till 11:15 AM but Copa Airlines said we had to get to the airport 3 hours ahead. And we expected check out to take forever.

When we got downstairs before 8 – the bell boy said he thought we were way early. But we pressed ahead. In a flurry of efficiency we were checked out by 8 AM – food and drinks for the week under $200. Asked for a taxi fpr 8:30 AM and of course we were at the airport by 8:40 AM. The Aero Republica counter was closed – and the guard said they would open at 10 AM. Arghhhh Had a café con leche – only coffee in Colombia. Walked by the beach one last time. About 9:45 AM we went to the counter – and as soon as we turned up – they opened. True to Colombia standards the guard didn’t know – but of course would not admit it.

Uneventful flight to Bogota. An Aero Republica representative collected us and walked us somewhere to give is a tax exempt voucher (bizarre). On to the flight to Panama City – after a last empanada – and some huge ice cream I didn’t really need. Uneventful flight to Panama City. En route home now – to be reunited with my baby Sydney soon. May get to come home from business trip early (on Wednesday). That would be great – even if it is to do a boring briefing.

Felt soooo rested this morning (not so much now). A week of lounging, swimming and sleeping hit the spot – our first rest since going to Nuevo Vallarta for a few days in November ’07 (visit to Paraguay in February, mad dash through Northern Spain culminating in Pamplona for running of the bulls, and the African Adventure do not count as “relaxation”. I could do some work – but I think I will play solitaire and freecell instead :-). The work will keep another day (or two or three).

Love of Beer Trumps Fear of Sand

Last full day in Santa Marta. Had a great night’s sleep – from 10:30 PM to 8:30 AM. Another gorgeous, sunny day. Woke up feeling sad – partly because it is our last day here and partly because my “monthly visitor” has put an end to pool fun.

Mark made me a grilled cheese for brunch. I had gotten myself a brownie (diet out the window – gotta find out from Beth if we’ll have a Class Reunion this year and get serious about a “self improvement” regime).

Decided to go to the beach and sit in one of the cabanas (more like tarps over chairs). Very nice setting – not crowded and the folks selling food, drinks, jewelry, etc. are not too pushy. Walked around some – always nice to feel the ocean and the sand. Got a good view of the condos – if I had $100,000 to spare I would be the proud owner of Colombian beach front property. They assured me Sydney would be allowed, but they probably don’t really know. Mark said we should just rent a place – said he’d like Chile. So I immediately came up with Valparaiso and started to make plans. I could teach English as a Second Language. Or I could write – Valparaiso certainly would be conducive to writing. Maybe I can create my own genre – Magical Realism meets Inside Beltway Incompetence. I said this to Carl over e-mail and he suggested a title “100 Years if Ineptitude”. May have something there …. But it sounds more like a comic strip. Plus might get sued by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. Except for having to get a lawyer to defend me, that would be nice as I might get to meet him.

If I could have picked what I wanted to REALLY do – and supporting me was not a concern – I would have wanted to be a writer. I said this to Becky while I was at Imperial in the 90s (ironically writing my thesis – which has probably been read by two people – not even sure Peter and the examiners read it in its entirety). Becky said there was still plenty of time – that I had led an interesting enough life to give me ample material. And that was before things got even crazier! I often like to think of what would be a good opening sentence for my “novel” (though I think I may be more the short story type). Something catchy, like “Billy Pilgrim has come unstuck in time”. I thought about it at the beach -- think my theme will be something along the lines of “She never saw the need for accurate translations.” Can cover just about anything I’ve experienced.

Mark eventually came down and we sat by the pool a bit – then convinced him he should go to the beach as he could get cheaper beer there. That’s all it took – his natural aversion to sand trumped by his love of cheap beer. Lost count of how many beers he had – I had ice cream – which was not that good. Eventually we came back in and went to the gas station for a snack. Out of empanadas … the country is starting to say goodbye. If Sydney were here I would want to stay another week … I think I am finally in rhythm. Our next vacation is in three months – Kuwait. Staying at a fancy Hilton on the beach. I hope my monthly nemesis stays away ….. Then three months after we go to Greenland (gotta get free Hotels in Copenhagen with Hilton points – hope Jessica booked stuff OK – seems to be taking forever to get vouchers). And then three months after Guadalupe – another RCI exchange – need to get air tickets – hopefully free. May not even be at the beach – but I’m sure there is a pool – and I think it is not in an isolated spot.

When it comes to “work to live, or live to work” – I think we are more at “work to vacation”. Except I can never be totally happy – as when I’m home I want to be on Holiday but when I’m on Holiday, I miss Sydney. And when I return home I get separation anxiety from Mark (we both have business trips next week – Sydney back with Lynn). Not the paralyzing kind of separation anxiety I used to get as a child from Maggie, my Mom and my Grandparents – but hard enough. I need to get over this sadness …. Just had a lovely Holiday and should be all tanned and rested! Must be hormonal L

A Visit to Santa Marta

Got up eventually and rode the local bus to Santa Marta (about 40 cents -- versus $25 for a tour). Got off by "El Rodadero" and hung out a while. Negotiated for a t-shirt for Mark (that will shrink). Mark got a few beers. Talked to the Hotel guys that had a shop from which they sold Time Shares. They gave us a ride back --- got an empanada at the gas station and now watching "The Island" (with Spanish subtitles). Took a break for sunset pics. Mark started to pack so I am mad at him .... we are not leaving until FRIDAY! The good thing is we will see Sydney.

Back to doing Nada

Woken up by the phone at 8:30 AM. Tour operator wants to take us to Santa Marta at 9 AM. No can do – there was not that much to see in Cartagena – so I know there won’t be anything in Santa Marta. Back to sleep – but then wake up to finish “Shopaholic …”

Mark wakes up and I talk him into making me another yummy grilled cheese (which reminds me of Mary Ellen, Peter and Eileen Healy – our landlord’s kids when we first moved to Dayton and my three summer charges as a teenager (probably my most responsible job ever) – made them grilled cheese most every day; get to see what they are up to via High School news every once in a while; lost touch after my Mom “caused” the scandalous divorce of our neighbor -- their Mom not wanting them to have anything to do with our family). Another area I shall never know about – though even if my Mom were alive today I don’t think I would ask. I don’t know that anyone really “causes” a divorce – but even if they do they certainly do not admit it to themselves – so asking is futile. Ask Brad and Angie ….

Mark manages to go to the store by himself and get the right stuff. Clearly I am not as indispensable as I fancy myself. Off to the gorgeous pool, where I hung out all day (and kept up with e-mail – gosh I wish I could just telecommute from some warm place – I swear I would be more efficient). Went to the gas station for a snack … and waited for the sun to go down to see if Mark might visit the pool. Despite SPF 30 I did manage to burn myself ….. Gotta be more careful. Gorgeous sunset ... and talked Mark into a sun downer swim (always a coup!).

Went back to "The Restaurant" for dinner (it was all together crowded -- 3 couples!). Mark picked up the smallest cat (amazing that he does not get scratched -- he has a way with animals though -- I would have been torn to pieces). I miss my Sydney!

A Visit to Cartagena

Last night we were eating the usual fare at “The Restaurant” when the waiter came to get me because I had a call. (A bit reminiscent of when the Pit Boss tracked me down to the Poker Tables in Reno, when Anthony got sick – thereby bringing my poker-playing career to a halt because of the trauma associated with your baby throwing up while you were at the tables). Seems like they had managed to get enough takers for Cartagena so a tour was all set – leaving at 4 AM (ouch). So – I wolfed down a flan and we ran to bed (about 8:30 PM – the horrors of being up so late!). When we walked by reception – we had a message that we would be leaving at 4:30 AM (which is what the brochure said in the first place!).

So after staying up to watch dumb flick (at least me – Mark was snoozing in no time) – I wake up about 2:30 AM with a horribly upset stomach. By the time we get up at 4 AM my stomach is queasy – but livable. We are sure they will be late – but they are amazingly punctual – 4:30 AM by satellite. So off we go – with two couples and a kid from Bogota, the driver and the tour guide (with me being the only bilingual participant – thereby making me responsible for translating for Mark). After a great snooze in the pretty comfy van (despite the super loud music) – we wake up at the Restaurante Costa Alegre (Happy Coast Restaurant). This is as “local” as they come – and not too sanitary – so I am sure I am going to die. I eat a couple of bites and start saying my prayers. Mark ate everything – but avoided the “fresh juice”.

Off we go again and in half an hour or so arrive in beautiful Cartagena (which Mark somehow confuses with Medellin – but no one understands him so it doesn’t matter). I decide that accurate translation is overrated – so rather than stress myself I will just translate as the Spirit moves me – I think my translations are better than real life in any case. Our first stop is Cartagena’s highest point – “La Popa”; Monastery visited by Pope JP II. Very pretty – but not much to see. The “English speaking” Museum guide says to me “perfecto, I will speak slowly and you translate”. He is not that accurate himself (not very consistent with the signs) – so my accuracy does not matter. He tells me about Havana and Cartagena being sister cities (well – not present Havana – old Havana). And about some Cuban guy named Pedro who liberated Cartagena (as opposed to the great South American Liberator – Simon Bolivar). I of course have never heard of Pedro but pretend I know all about him so as not to offend the guide. My favorite part is “Salto del Cabron” – where the founding priest threw off the goat being sacrificed to Satan. Of course – Cabron has a separate meaning – but maybe not in Colombia as no one else is laughing. We stretch our visit as much as possible – but eventually leave.

Next stop is the “Castillo de San Felipe” – continued more or less accurate translation about boring battles that the Museum guide goes on and on about – and then I spot them – the site that will make the $70 price worth it. The “Zapatos Viejos” – a pair of giant shoes. The photo ops are awesome; the Museum guide “liberates” us to go the Zapatos Viejos – and despite the heat I lead the way and we arrive there well ahead of the others.

The Museum guide says goodbye (stays by the Zapatos Viejos drinking beer). We then see the “India Catalina” (a two second drive by a statue of an Indian woman), drive by the “Ciudad Amurallada (walled city) and Gabriel Garcia Marquez’ Cartagenian house. I swoon at that. Mark of course has not heard of Gabriel Garcia Marquez – the Nobel Prize winning Colombian author (100 years of Solitude, Love in the Time of Cholera – two of my fave books). Father of something called “Magical Realism” – which to me is simply reality for Latin Americans. Stories in which the magical live side by side with the real – as if it were perfectly normal. Pretty much the sort of place I grew up in – the line between the Spirit and real worlds totally blurred – with deference to the former of course.

We get off at “Las Bovedas” – and walk around the fancy shopping district. Everyone gets offered t-shirts, hats and costume jewelry. I get accosted by the emerald sellers – befitting my status as “high maintenance”. I am asked if my tall American husband would not want to buy me emeralds – 50% off. I say not in this lifetime. To which they reply, “ahy, tacaño” (cheap). Which of course sends me into contagious hysterics and the emerald sellers forget about the sales. The beer sellers are of course much more successful.

Off we go to lunch. Not at the nice "Developed World" looking restaurants – at the Colombian “typical” beach restaurants. My mind says “Danger.” But the food is delicious – and I eat more than I should. I can hear my stomach gurgle. The tour guide comes to me and asks if “¿puedes regalarme el dinero por el tour?”; which translates to “could you gift me the tour money?”. The Colombians do not seem to ask you to give them stuff directly – they ask for a gift – like could you give me the gift of your passport number? I think I am getting the nuances better – these guys are so polite. Of course he has no way of taking credit cards – despite the assurances of the hotel’s tour agent. But not to worry – we shall stop by a “cajero” (ATM) – and while we are at it, the pharmacy.

I describe my dilemma to the pharmacist – who gives me four pills that seem like lomatril for only $1 (for four pills – should have gotten more). Then we go to the ATM – which I have a have a hard time using because the card gets spit out straight away and the pin number gets put in last. But I get the 300,000 Colombian pesos eventually and off we go. I start to read “Confessions of a Shopaholic” – which is eerily like an autobiography of my mother.

We made a stop at a gorgeous rest stop (where the tour guide asked about stopping for breakfast – perhaps realizing that there is a reason an awful lots of his costumers seem to need lomatril (he told me he carried some just for such occasions). Back at the Hotel a bit past 6 PM. Go to the gas station for supplies and Mark makes me a grilled cheese sandwich (my tummy feels fine – but why tempt fate).

Stay up forever reading “Confessions ….”, the London setting, the references to great clothes and the similarities to my Mom too hard to resist. Tomorrow will be a lazy day ……..

Doing Nada .....

Got up a tad earlier today (probably ‘cause I didn’t spend half the night up). Around 9:30 AM – 10 hrs+ sleep. Zootoed some (self control out the window). The repairman ignore the “do not disturb sign and tried to come in to fix the lamp and the hairdryer. Got up and went to get some eggs for breakfast. Mark made me scrambled eggs and we watch “The Bing Bang”. Reading the Spanish subtitles is funny – translation is not that easy!

The repairman came and fixed the lamp – but said the hairdryer was broken. Call reception for a loaner. C’est le vie – an excuse not to dry my hair.

Went to the pool – tried to book Cartagena. Not enough people – so we booked the Santa Marta “City Tour” and are on “stand by” for Cartagena. Hey, we tried.

Mark is in the room. I sat by the pool a while but I felt bad all alone. Called Anthony who was asleep at 12:30 PM and did not want to talk. Called Mark who yelled at me. Snfffff – kinda lonely. But certainly relaxed! This is a more realistic photo of what I have been doing … LOL

Ventured outside the Hotel ... and back to "the Restaurant"

After enough sitting by the pool and a few swims we decided to venture outside the hotel. Saw a couple of small bars (almost shacks really). And a gas station with a little snack bar. Got a snack and talked to the VERY nice owner (he set a table in the shade – conscious of Mark’s very pale skin). He told us about the bus into town (only 50 cents!). We may do that. On the way back a dog followed us. Mark as usual petted it (and we wonder why HE gets infections!).

Had a night time swim (10 laps – used to be able to easily do 25+ -- but it has been a while. Mark can cover the length of the pool in half the strokes. Wish I was as graceful a swimmer. But hey – at least I put in the effort to learn to swim as an adult. Hung out in the hot tub and eaves dropped on conversations. Interesting, in a harmless sorta way.

Had dinner at “The Restaurant”— not a big place and not a lot of people – but yummy food and nice waiters. Asked about dessert (not on the menu – but not too many Hispanics can live without their flan). Sure enough they had flan. Back to the room by 8:30 (a record of staying up!). Went downstairs to load photos and to zootoo (I wish I did not have such an addictive personality). Maybe we will do an excursion tomorrow or Monday …….

First Full Day in Santa Marta

Had a horrid night. Slept a few hours then woke up at 4 AM (I think) freezing. So I decided to just try to talk to and generally bug Mark – who was none too happy about it. He must have been really desperate ‘cause he told me I could turn off the a/c (our room was 69 F). As soon as I wasn’t so called I realized I was hungry. So I bugged Mark some more. He had a granola bar, which he gave to me. That seemed to do the trick ‘cause I fell asleep. Started having nightmares – or not really nightmares per say, just odd dreams. Anthony and I loosing my grandmother (who has been dead for over 11 years) was the most vivid.

We eventually woke up a bit before 11. I didn’t think I needed to shower as I was going to the pool – which somehow seems to get Mark all worked up. He needs to chill – too many showers are not good for you!

We got some food at the Mini-Market – they don’t seem to have much. But certainly enough for lunch. And it is dirt cheap.
Have been hanging out at the pool since. The pool is huge – a 37 room hotel with probably a 2 acre pool. Most of the guests seem to be families – which makes sense as this is South America’s “summer” school holidays (though we are North of the Equator – it’s not far). Saw a giant iguana – got some good photos with new camera. Will send off to Jess and Akos for identification when I get back home.

The restaurant had at least some clients. Food is cheap. Beer cheaper, which Mark is taking full advantage of. Found the tours lady and the tours are about $75 max – food included. So we’ll probably go to Cartagena and maybe to see the town of Santa Marta. Going to Cartagena is a 4 AM departure – which hopefully we can muster. Santa Marta is a 2 PM departure -- more our speed!

Ironically I am being annoyed by aircraft noise. It isn’t constant – just what we call “single events”. We are a mile away from Santa Marta’s airport and no doubt outside what we call “significant” noise – 65 db average day and night (with night getting a higher weighing ‘cause awakenings are more annoying). So work is right here with me. We no doubt contributed to the noise because of the “Stage II” aircraft phase out in the developed world. All those planes found their way to the developing word. So I registered a “complaint” with my boss. And no sooner had I done that the helicopter noise started. I probably only hear the noise ‘cause it is my job to sop it – no one else seems bothered. Will probably go for a walk in a little bit – and hopefully not get kidnapped.

Arrived in Santa Marta

Somehow with our messing around in Bogota we neglected to get any Columbian money. And when we landed in Santa Marta the ATM was broken. Got a cab driver to drive us to town to a working ATM, then to the hotel. Charged us only $15 – had Mark give him $20. At least the Columbians seem to abide by “unwritten” the Latin American code that most of us abide by that you don’t screw other Latin Americans over!

The hotel (Costa Azul Beach Resort) was reminiscent of Africa in that it took half an hour to check two sets of people in. The receptionist kept multi-tasking – but she was not proficient at it. But the African experience is still reasonably fresh – so no worries for us. The bell boy brought us up to our room (where I quickly understood why the receptionist wanted to know where the other people were – given that our room has six beds and two baths). It does face the sea and it is very nice. No rats in sight (yet).

The so called restaurant was quite funny. We were the only customers and I get the felling that will be the case all week. The store is close so that was our only choice. Food is dirt cheap – better than we cook, if not fancy. A cat came over to beg while we were eating and I fed it. Wish I could have cuddled it but its claws seemed pretty sharp ….. Pool seems gorgeous – will check it out tomorrow. Bummer I left my Warren Buffett bio behind. Got “Confessions of a Shopaholic at the Airport”. Not too long. Seems as if I will rest whether I want to or not. There is free wireless so maybe I can zootoo. Though I have no way of downloading photos to my laptop as the work computer geeks disabled that feature.

Turned in a bit after 8 PM. I see lots of laziness in our future. Hope we get up early enough to make it to the shop! Not sure we can really walk anywhere without getting murdered or kidnapped. And to be honest that African expedition seems to have done away with what little common sense we had … which Anthony maintains was never much.

Tomorrow is another day … we shall see what adventures (or lack thereof) we can muster. Our room is freezing. Maybe I will have one of those "the worse the better" experiences and appreciate the sun manana .....

Off to Columbia

Got up at the ungodly hour of 2:45 (after sleeping about three hours – thanks to too much zootoo, a bubble bath and wanting to watch the DVD of Africa Akos just sent). Nothing unusual happened. Taxi on time. Flight to Panama on time. Panama’s airport was gorgeous (albeit there seemed to be 20 chocolate stores and nowhere to get some water! Flight to Bogota on time. I fear that somehow compared the Indiana Jones pace of Africa, anything else will feel like a church picnic!

A bit of excitement in Bogota. Not real obvious how to get from the International to the Domestic terminal. And not knowing the answer does not seem to deter Columbians from advising you. Both the flight attendant and the guy next to us on the plane insisted we did not need to go through customs in Bogota – of course Santa Marta would have a customs agent (yes – this is soooo common – countries let people in and then they can wander through their domestic system unimpeded). Anyhow we did go through customs and then decided that since we had a boarding pass we didn’t need to check in with our airline. We further decided we should just get on the Avianca bus (never mind that Avianca was NOT our airline). So we ride around – I verify with a Columbian airline agent that we are on the right bus. Oh, yes, of course – just get off where everyone else got off. But of course we end up in the wrong place – so I have to ask someone to get us back and trust that they know what they are talking about ….

Anyhow an Avianca bus driver did take us to the right stop. Which was just round the corner from where we started. By now we has squandered all the extra time we had and barely made it to the gate with half an hour to go. But our flight was delayed because of a “mechanical inspection” and we would be advised by the mechanics at 3:30 PM. Had no clue what that meant. Funny though I understand all the words, I do not really know what people mean. The Columbian nuances and meanings somehow elude me. At 3:30 they boarded us – so I guess that’s what that meant! So off to Santa Marta.

Barack O's Inauguration Day

Didn't make it to the festivities. Set my alarm for 6 AM -- went to church. Froze to death -- so I just did not see walking 5 miles and by 8 AM it was too late to Metro. So went back to bed with Sydney (he is SOOO cuddly) and then got up to watch on TV.

We ended up also watching Bailey as well after I drove his Mom to the Metro so she can work at the Balls. It was certainly a great speech -- and I wish I had been downtown -- but I think I made the right choice. Going on Holiday on Friday and this will be the first vacation that is not some insane expedition that we've had since Nov 2007 -- really looking forward to the rest.

Still -- I kinda wonder what drove my decision -- and whether I let Mark have a say. Was I REALLY worried about the cold and crowds? Was I worried I had felt sick the night before and needing a bush break before I got to our PA Ave party? Was it worry of not getting home and leaving Sydney unattended? Or worry about Mark ...... I just seem to obsessively watch him -- check for evidence of illness. Wondering if every symptom is a sign of something horrid. And questioning whether his blaming Africa for everything (including a backache) is a repeat of my Mother ignoring the fact that she was ill -- willing herself to die at 50. Maggie thinks she probably did at some level -- but why?

Somehow I am more and more obsessed with knowing my Mom's reasons -- even though I know I never will and it is all pointless speculation. She certainly was not the diary/confessional type (unlike me!). Not knowing makes me see a repeat in Mark, and to a lesser extent Maggie. I'm kinda scared today as I am afraid for the first time I let that fear drive a major decision.

He seemed fine last night (here he is with Michael Anthony -- H's baby -- whom I have not watched in a while -- making me feel a tad guilty). And tonight he is OK. But in the morning he was wearing a coat -- inside -- which freaked me. Was also not helped by Linda -- formerly Smith -- now Garver -- calling to report that someone at the "Reno" meeting told her Mark looked very ill (apparently because of his tremors -- which at least I know are just hereditary and not life threatening).

I think I need therapy -- 'cause I spend an awful lot of time worrying about what could be -- and I am not in the moment. Unless the moment entails some dangerous situation I have put myself in. Which I probably do to keep myself in the moment ....... Gotta try to make it to yoga Wed -- was cancelled tonight. That's as good as therapy.

Too much analysis -- probably the product of four days off and too much sleep. Will think about this later ......

Hotel for Dogs

I really, really, REALLY want to see Hotel for Dogs. But this AM I got and experienced it. Mark woke up a bit before 9 AM -- I had my alarm set for 9:30 AM so I could go to the Mother ship -- the Elizabeth Arden Spa.

When Mark went downstairs he found Roma -- who comes over every day while his Mom works; so Mark let him into our room. Then when he was walking Sydney he ran into Bailey and his Mom -- who was going to work. So Bailey came over.

I woke up before the alarm went off. Roma's face was inches from mine. Bailey was standing on top of me and Sydney was licking me. Too funny -- I guess I got to go to Hotel for Dogs after all!

Thinking about History on the eve of "History"

Two days till inauguration. Guess the Bushes are packing. Starting to get DC alerts about bridge closings. What a mess. And it is freezing cold -- wonder how well attended the Lincoln Memorial concert will be.

Went to church last night so this morning went to the movies. Have to go meet my new ESL co-teacher at 3 (PM) so we went to the 10:05 AM show. It was hard getting up that early after staying up till all hours trying to dry the carpet. When I let Sydney out back the carpet was still soggy and cold. Brrrr.

Just returned from seeing "Defiance". It was about four Jewish brothers who hid and fought in the forest during WWII. I did not realize it was a true story till the end (and of course as usual -- Mark knew this and failed to inform me -- noting instead that everyone knew this except me). The Bielski brothers were real -- and formed a community in the forest in Western Belorussia. Lots of Jews survived because of them.

As I was sitting at the theater, I could not help thinking about 1995. Taking Anthony to Auschwitz -- in January. Mark was at a conference in Warsaw -- so we met him at the weekend and took the train to Krakow. Joined an excursion to the Camps. It was gruesome and yet you could not look away. Anthony of course was the only 5 year old in our group -- in fact the only 5 year old the poor tour guide had ever seen on a tour. She was horrified and kept offering to watch him while we went into various places. Walking through Auschwitz is one of those experiences where you really have to detach yourself -- I found it easier if I just walked with Anthony a bit away from the group -- away from the "humans" that did this. Conscious that Mark is half German and Anthony a quarter German.

I don't know that Mark and I were thinking straight or even consciously thought about it -- but even though Anthony most likely will not consciously remember -- I think I somehow thought it was critically important for Anthony to see this. Many kids his age had to go through this -- and he has grown up the child of so much privilege. Some of Anthony's German-American relatives seemed to believe the Holocaust did not happen or was exaggerated -- I needed him to know better. At some level I believe that seeing Auschwitz at such a young age has helped make Anthony as empathetic as he is.

Common sense did eventually take over (in the eyes of the tour guide) when Anthony stayed with her as we saw the ovens. I think I managed 2-3 minutes max myself. The woman was older -- she may have even been a survivor. All I knew was there was no way I was going to cross her. and let Anthony see those ovens. That's OK -- he had seen enough.

A few months later we took Anthony to Israel. After one of our not so well thought out excursions to Bethlehem we gave Anthony the next chapter of his Holocaust education. Bethlehem by the way was easy to get to on our own (I despise excursions) -- impossible to get out 'cause the Arab taxis were not allowed to stop and take us. So we had to walk past the border -- and then try to flag a cab on the Sabbath; but hey that's nothing compared to the fact that we forgot to take our hotel info with us when we left our flat in London and when we got to Tel Av iv had to walk around looking for a hotel -- during Orthodox Easter. Via one of those miracles that only happen in the Holy Land managed to stumble upon the hotel we had a room reserved at -- God truly does walk the streets of Israel!

We took Anthony to the Vad Vashem Museum at the suggestion of the cab driver (after of course he lectured us for a half hour about our stupidity and child endangerment). At the end of our walk about, we took Anthony through the garden dedicated to the Heroes that saved Jews during WWII. Tried to make sure to talk to him about the connection and the contrast between this place and Auschwitz. Though only 5 -- I hoped he would know that he needed to be part of the group being honored -- despite the cost.

And just a few weeks later, the circle came to a close. As we were living in London we were able to go to the celebrations of the 50th Anniversary of V-E Day at Hyde Park. Anthony had a chance to see some of the men and women that fought and defeated the Nazis. What a year!What an incredible set of experiences to have at 5. Will they make a difference on the type of person Anthony is and will be? I hope so! Are we irresponsible parents? Perhaps -- but hey -- there is no school for parenting and one does the best one can.

Of course despite Anthony's "intellectual" upbringing -- stuff happens. When he was in High School (may have been freshman year) he was assigned to read Eli Wiesel's "Night". "Night" is of course biographical -- about Eli Wiesel's Holocaust experiences. Anthony is a master procrastinator -- saved from academic mediocrity by his natural talents -- try to motivate a kid with a 4.0 to see the need to do his homework! I asked him if he had read the book -- and he of course said "yes". So I asked him how he liked it -- and he tells me "oh it was so sad how the boy died in the end". Imagine Anthony's surprise when I said to him -- "Amazing, Anthony -- as Dad and I just saw Eli Wiesel speak at Israel's Independence celebration at the Omni Shoreham downtown". Which we had! I think Anthony learned two things that day -- the meaning of autobiography and to think REALLY hard before lying -- he sure does seem to confess a lot -- even when I wish he wouldn't -- LOL!

Oh, oh -- never say "worst ever"!

'Cause as I was typing that -- the door bell rang. Our neighbor Jim was there and said that there was water coming out of our house or Lewis'. I ran to the basement and the carpet was all wet and I could hear water running. The water was REALLY cold. I ran up and got Mark to have a look while I tried to find emergency services.

Mark could not figure out how to turn off the outside water (which seemed to be the culprit -- though I also suspected the water heater since several neighbors have had water heater problems recently). So I called Jim's house and Melissa sent him over. Jim knew what to do and shut off the valve to the outside. Luckily the water heater seems intact. The water damage 24 hour emergency service place that was gonna call in 10 minutes never did. Jim loaned us a water vacuum and I spent two and a half hours sucking up water. It was just a 3 gallon model so had to stop a lot and ditch the water. Mark took on the job of emptying while I did the pick up. Sydney was funny -- whenever he heard the vacuum stop -- he would alert Mark.

At first the assembly line was very rapid but then it took a while and my back got really sore. Somewhere along the way I noticed the furnace was not running and the house temperature had really dropped. Great -- no heat and flooded. But Jim had just turned off the furnace while the water was seeping in. It is still somewhat wet -- but not as bad. Gave up for the night -- will see how it looks in the AM. Hope we don't get mold.

Jim is such a nice guy -- always willing to help (and solves all the stuff we mess up). He's been to Guantanamo and Afghanistan with reserves -- guess he can handle stuff. Gotta get him some wine to thank him.

Hope no other house disasters occur 'cause I don't think you can get any help in the DC area through inauguration! Thought this pix of Sydney -- the victim of static electricity -- captured the end of the evening. I had ambitions of finishing two work jobs -- but was not to be ..... In the morning. After we see Defiance!

Worst Week Ever (so why am I smiling?)

Well -- not sure it was THE worst week ever -- but it was a hard week. I was sad 'cause Anthony was gone. Work was miserable. Had to give speeches on Sunday (yes, Sunday) and Tuesday. A presentation to a small group on Wednesday -- that somehow can't seem to understand the meaning of "Carbon Neutral Growth" --- dahhh boys and girls it means that if you grow your carbon output by 10% your efficiency needs to improve 10%. Or you use 10% renewable fuel (well more as no fuel is 100% renewable). Or you go to trading or taxes or charges. NOT rocket science!

The tasks kept flying in -- and getting folks to do stuff was tough. We have taken on a lot of work -- with same staff -- and people are tired. The moaning is something else though. It was hard with temp boss away and regular boss away. Plus departing politicals demanding stuff. Oh, yes, I am "so humble" -- but write me 100 good-bye letters -- and never mind going back and forth with commas and small changes. Helloooooo -- have you heard of e-mail? Just send an e-mail for goodness sake. But of course that also has to be written and re-written and edited again and again and again. We have important work to do -- I wish our leaders would join the 21st century. Sooner or later folks will leave and hopefully we will go paperless. I think a lot of it is the older Admin assistants who cannot let go.

I must have slept just 4 hours several nights -- trying to meet every deadline and review everything I asked someone to do. To no avail -- despite many deadlines met I do not think we advanced our agenda. Oh and that DL stuck me with doing most (if not all) of a common project we have to do. Some things never change!

Had a haircut today. Same as always. The Spa was empty -- guess a lot of folks cleared out of Washington. It took forever to leave the parking lot -- I thought something may have gone wrong or that traffic was all backed up. But no -- just everyone decided to leave at the same time and there was only one cashier. C'est le vie.

Oh well -- need to chill and get some sleep. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. And I just seem incapable of NOT smiling :-)

I Feel Sad

Who knows, maybe I am hormonal but I feel quite blue today. Most be because Anthony goes back to Pittsburgh in a couple of days. Just three more nights at home :-( Has been great having him home four weeks -- and as he was working in my building we got to ride together and I even had lunch with him a few times. He even talked to me some LOL. I will be so lonely and sad come Monday when I go in on my own.

In a way I am also sad because my detail will end in a few weeks. On February 20. I have lots of trips and stuff to do that I could not get done if I was still on detail but in a way I have enjoyed it and learned a lot.

Put in an 11+ hour day -- mostly cleaning up messes and trying to answer questions. Wasn't able to take Sydney for his long walk before dinner. Then decided to spy on Mark by calling our friend Bobby whom Mark saw last night (I could not get Mark on his Blackberry while I was making dinner for me and Anthony, so I became agitated). Instead of my "insight", I got Bobby trying to sell me on his latest scheme. LOL. Glad tomorrow is Friday but then Anthony will leave Sunday. Mega :-( Oh and I have to go talk at a Workshop on Sunday. I hate these Sunday Workshops -- no one shows up to listen. But I guess you can say whatever you want.

Got an invite to view the inaugural parade from some Pennsylvania Avenue offices. Will only go if Mark will go as I have no clue how to get there. Unless we walk. Surely we can get the Metro part way at least. But it is hard to pass up on witnessing history!

Witnessing History

I know History will be made on January 20th -- but today I got to witness the type of history that I think will change the world in ways that will compare with the the printing press, the Wright Brothers flight, the Internet, satellites .....

Got to go down to Houston for Continental's biofuel demo (this photo has John from ATA, Billy from Boeing, Nancy from ATA, Rich from CAAFI, Leah from Continental and me and Nate from FAA). What was amazing is that in a short time since the Virgin flight -- this flight was on a twin engine aircraft (Virgin and Air New Zealand used 4 engine aircraft), the blend was 50% (Virgin used 20%) and the fuel was truly sustainable -- algae and jatropha. The day was picture perfect -- bright blue sky, 70s. The speeches from the usual suspects were somehow more inspiring. And you could sense the commitment we have to get it right this time (I started working in alternative fuels in '83 -- we gave it up around '86 thanks to the "glut"). The data will be priceless and I think will move us to getting the fuel approved for use a lot faster than any of us dreamed of. Achieving near carbon neutral energy, emerging markets for developing nations, increasing energy supplies -- the fact that all of us are at it even though the price of oil has dropped. I hope we keep the momentum and make this a reality. On Tuesday night a reporter asked me what attracted me to science and engineering -- I have been asked that 100 times but I think I have finally stumbled on the answer -- because you get the chance of making imagination reality. I think the Wright Brothers, Sir Frank Whittle and Hans Von Ohain, Amelia Earhart, Charles Lindbergh and so many others are looking down and are very proud today.

Oh yeah and I got to stand by the runway ... so 50s LOL

In Houston

In Houston tonight (view from my window -- can barely see a COntinental tail). My first business trip since October – have surely enjoyed the break from all the travel. I am home the next two weeks then off to Columbia on vacation. After that have a trip to Florida and a quick trip to Montreal. One more week of “Acting Acting” and my detail is done. Then I have to go to California for a week and a half (over a weekend, bummer). Then Italy in March, home a week and then London (back home April 1). Ouch – I will be exhausted. In April just have our vacation to Kuwait (and I want to get in a visit to Anthony – maybe first weekend in April – as I definitely do not want to drive over Easter. I want to try to have a Florida road trip with Maggie – not sure when to squeeze in. Would like to take Sydney – he is a South Beach sorta of dog!

The flight out was super bumpy. Sat next to this woman that kept talking (despite my efforts to do my work). Let’s see – she is just 38 years old. Is a dentist – who practices in DC, Houston and Virginia. Her husband is a cardiologist – who does heart transplants for children. Oh, and he is also an engineer who works at the Pentagon. She has a 19 year old son who is a veterinary – and started a practice in Houston (aside from two small children). So – this woman had a child at 18 – managed to go to dental school – and somehow her genius son finished college and vet school in record time. I think someone had too many vodkas (five by my count – I cannot believe the flight attendant kept serving her). If she is a dentist, I would not want to go to her – I would go nuts listening to her carrying on! Mental patient seems like a more logical occupation – LOL. O and she swore we started descent a hour before we did. She says she flies every week but seemed terrified of turbulence and points out every cloud. Something is clearly not right!

Get to see a biofuel flight demo tomorrow. Really excited about that. First in the U.S., first using algae, first on a twin engine plane. I hope we get alternative fuels right this time – this is my second go. First one being my first job – which thanks to Herb Lander’s persuasiveness derailed my planned career developing wrinkle creams for P&G. Well Herb Lander and the huge recession – no guarantee that P&G would have offered me a job had I shown up for my interview!

Hope Anthony is OK at home – hated to spend one of the nights he is home away. He leaves Sunday – and is going to Florida for Easter break so he won’t be home until May. If he gets an internship somewhere else this may be the last time he is home for an extended period (unless he comes home next Christmas – which there is never a guarantee of). Then again this is Anthony – only way he will get an internship out of town is if I apply for it! I think him getting an internship out of town would be sort of like his Spring break in the Keys – sad he is not coming home, but thrilled that he actually did something on his own. I do pray he finds his way.

Mark is in Orlando. I worry so much about his. He sees that crazy Bobby Webb on Wed. Hope Bobby does not get him into any trouble – Bobby has even less common sense than I do! I really worry about Mark’s recent symptoms – even though they seem to be subsiding.

Oh well – hope I can sleep in this strange bed tonight! Without my hound Sydney. Oh yeah we will be away during Sugar and Champagne (the Washington Humane Society fund raiser where you can bring your dig). But the Alexandria Humane Society is having a Valentine’s dance so my goal is to go to that (Mr. Sydney is such a cool accessory and I can wear my Manolos).

Back to "Normal"

Whatever "normal" is. Put away most of the Christmas decorations, except for the nativity set. Has to stay up till 6 January. Oh and the Christmas cards sleigh. I still have to read a lot of the letters ....

Mark left today for a business trip. Sydney knew something was up 'cause he jumped on his lap this morning (and Sydney never goes on the blue chair if there is a person there unless there is a cookie involved). Poor Sydney was happy to go in the car -- but then he cried when we dropped Mark off. Glad Anthony is home to keep us company! Sydney is sooo super cute. I cannot stop taking his picture!

I continue to worry and worry about Mark. I must have sent him a dozen messages after I checked the United website, which said his plane had landed. Eventually got a short message. Then I heard from JP Clarke that Mark did not recognize him. How does a person not recognize a humongous Jamaican Professor! Oh yeah and he did not recognize Michelle Kirby who he met in September. Maybe he's just being forgetful. I worry so much about him. I am sure he finds it annoying but I cannot help it. I just cannot imagine functioning without him ... I wish he would understand that.

When Sydney and I came back from the airport (via Whole Foods for bubble bath) saw Lynn and Bailey outside. Anthony was also just coming back from a haircut. So we stood outside and talked for a while. I gave Bailey his Christmas gift (a bone -- which despite being quite large he chewed all up!). Then Carter and his Mom showed up so we had 3 Cavs (well -- almost as Carter is a Cavashon). Carter's parents went to South Africa. Bummer -- Carter stayed with his grandparents -- wish I could have watched him :-( He is too cute.

Tomorrow is back to work .... and Anthony leaves in a week. I am soooo sad -- it was so nice to all be together over Christmas.