Hopkins Day -- All was OK

Today was my semi-annual visit to Hopkins -- for "in-depth" breast cancer screening. Everything was fine -- just a lot of stress as usual. This is just the visit to the nurse -- which three months after a visit to my Doctor might have been overkill. Plus now I have six months till the next visit ......

My appointment was at 10:30 in Baltimore. Left the house at 8:30 and the GPS noted a 9:40 arrival. After all the traffic got there at 10:25. The parking lot was not in operation. The traffic cop tried to stop me -- and I drove right past her. I attribute it to the Africa effect -- ignoring law enforcement. In reality they had valet parking so she had no reason to hassle me -- was probably just bored.

Got to the waiting room just in time -- but of course a basket case -- not aided by the desire to just skip the visit. Connie the nurse came out at about 10:45 -- but was running late and had someone ahead of me. Saw her at 11. Spent 15 minutes with her -- less than 5 on the exam itself. I think she spent the majority of the time assessing my mental health. I would give anything to read what she writes in my file. Anyhow I told her about Africa -- and to prove my sanity I told her how when the canoe almost capsized in the crocodile infested river I thought to myself "oh, good, I will not have to worry about breast cancer". In retrospect perhaps this was not the optimum way to convey sanity. When we finally got down to the business at hand everything was fine (at least the physical part -- she is not sharing her mental assessments -- though she has said my concern is justified). Have to go back in six months (early May) for "the works". The American Cancer Society recommends MRIs as an additional screening tool for people with higher than 20% life time risk (I am at 25% -- which I realize means 1 in 4 chances -- but it is hard to treat it as anything other than 100%). MRIs have lots of false positives so I guess I am in for a ride. But on the other hand the earlier the better (in this case the worse the better does not apply). I hope Mark plans well and is here May 6. The trouble with your husband having breast cancer is that he thinks you should react to it like he did -- like an inconvenience to get beyond. To me it is much more than that -- it is the memory of my Mother and the experience of my Sister. I can't even let myself go back to my Mother's room -- have to think of something else. I guess we have 180 days to "discuss" .....

On the drive home realized I had forgotten to eat ... so I had to stop and get something. Had thought to go back to work -- but that's not too realistic after this experience. Hiking 8 hours in the Central African Republic rain forest is like a Spa Day compared to the Hopkins experience. It took me until 10 PM to do the "must do work" for the day. I have got to get a grip on this subject ... I am driving myself bonkers.

Mark is back from Florida. Still trying to book Greenland but went ahead and got tickets to Copenhagen. Enlisted Jessica to help. Signed up for Skype. Ate dinner, packed lunch, walked the dog. A "routine" end to a very trying day -- and I am very thankful for it as I certainly would not want to be experiencing the alternative ........ I think I will go have a bubble bath -- lavender sounds good